Sunday, January 30, 2011

suddenly

i miss my bike, my boo, my kitty and the city. i have to keep reminding myself that i love this life.

and i do.

Sunday, January 9, 2011

limbo

"So this is the new year, and I (most definitely) feel (very) different." -deathcab (madlib)

2010 was a good year. I've probably accomplished the most this past year than I have in my entire life, and my obsessive compulsive disorder made sure that I've been able list all of my accomplishments this year, in chronological order, in my head, over and over again until I could recite it with my eyes closed and hands tied behind my back. Big fuckin' whoop. Now I have the problem of feeling the need and pressure to top it, to make the following years even better, or else I won't be able to forgive myself. So, I was in limbo and decided that moving to the mountains was a good temporary life choice. So what if I don't have the answers to your grilling questions? Are you that certain of your life that I should be of mine? It's been refreshing to come up here, to meet a handful of new people every day, and to realize that most the people who live here were/are just as lost as I am. As comforting as that is though, I'm going to try my best to dedicate this year to making the "correct" and important life changing decisions. After having my entire life, year after year planned out (not by choice), it's become difficult to avidly make decisions that may or may not drastically alter the direction in which my life will go. But I'm dedicated and convinced that by the end of this year I'll be able to say that the year was better than the previous and that the plans I have for the years to follow are even better.